Burgyone: Hi folks! It's been a while, on our way back to the rift a Romulan fleet met my ship and helped us with repairs. We detected a Imperial Fleet heading for a Narn Fleet and we're on our way.
Burgyone: Yeah, still headed there, it'll take a while....
Burgyone:..........
Burgyone:..........
Burgyone:....I really need another commentator here.
Burgyone: Ensign Insificant get over here now!!!
Ensign: Yes sir.
A plasma conduit explodes killing the Ensign.
Burgyone: D*MN!! Ensign Usless, over here now!
Ensign: No sir.
Burgyone: I am the superior officer, you will do as I say!!!
Ensign: Sir, there's another plasma conduit right there, it will most likely explode if I walk by it, and if not there's an airlock on the way...
Burgyone: YOU WILL FOLLOW MY ORDERS!!! *phasers the Ensign*
The Ensign slumps over, a doctor rushes over and promptly says "He's dead" The Ensign starts moving, and the Doctor phasers him again because he doesn't want to bother healing an Ensign.
Burgyone: Doctor! You care to commentate?
Doctor: Nah, have to stop a plague rampaging around the ship.
Burgyone tries a few other crew members with no luck.
Burgyone: Well, people, looks like we're stuck on a solo-commentator basis.
Officer: Yo, captain dude! We're about to fight the Imperial punks.
Burgyone: YAY!!! ACTION!!! Time to kill!
A fleet of Narn Heavy Cruisers (with White Star back-up are jumped by ISDs.
Burgyone: The ISDs shoot down a Narn Cruiser and a few fighters, we're decloaking to engage!
Romulan Warbirds: Wavy! Blam! BLAM! Boom!
Like the Drahk, the Narn are initially confused at help coming from nowhere but take it in stride and continue firing at the Imperial Ships.
Burgyone: The Imperial ships seem to be....leaking?..........no, it's a fleet of so many fighters it looks like a cloud! I must say I share Kahless and Z's confusion about how so many Ties can fit on a Imperial Warship.
The Imperial fighters start blasting away and the capital ships wait patiently until the fighters get out of the path of fire.
Burgyone: Hmm, it seems that every single Imperial fighter out there is either a Tie Advanced or a Tie Defender.
The Fleets engage in a vicous bloody battle, Narn fighters and the more powerful Ties seem about evenly matched.
Burgyone: Well, this is a switch from past battles......the Ties are putting up a fight! In fact they'd be winning if it weren't for the White Stars.
The Warbirds and Narn Cruisers line up and start lobbing torpedoes at the Imperial Fleet.
Burgyone: 4 of the Warbirds have lined up with 5 of the Narn cruisers and are focusing their fire on the SSD.
The Attack fleet causes some superfical damage to the SSD but a Warbird gets shot down.
Burgyone: It seems that a wormhole or jumpgate is opening........it's........VOYAGER?!?!
Janeway: Excuse me, could you tell us where we are?
Voyager bounces back and forth between B5 and SW ships trying to ask for directions to the Alpha Quadrant.
Burgyone: Well....this is odd. Oh, wait! A ISD just shot Voyager! It's turning around and firing all weapons at the ISD!
Burgyone: After that strafing run Voyager is helping the White Stars shoot down the TIEs. Another Narn ship is shot down.......BLOW THE SH*T OUT OF THAT SD!!!!!
The battle rages on, Imperial shields holding against most attacks. After a while Voyager notices the Romulans and gets really confused.
Burgyone: A White Star is dancing around a ISD and its laser blast....in what appears to be the Swan Lake Ballet.
Imperial Captain: Show off!!!
Burgyone: One of the TIE Defenders just caused two Narn fighters to crash into each other! Isn't it supposed to be TIEs crashing into each other? The same Defender just shot down another Narn fighter! Its joining a fleet of TIEs and firing at a crippled Narn Cruiser which goes down in a fireball....wait...this is space...how can..oh, nevermind a White Star comes in and wastes the majority of the TIEs, but our hot-shot friend flings in and fires a massive volley into the White Star's Bridge!
The White Star, already damaged, floats adrift, and the TIE pilot starts trash-talking.
TIE Pilot: Who's the man? Yeah, it's me! Anyone think they want a piece of THE MAN?
Burgyone: A Warbird decloaks so that the TIE is inbetween the wings. The Pilot panics and the Warbird fires a disrupter destroying the Fighter. The Warbird is now firing a volley of torpedoes at the SSD.
The Plasma torpedoes strike the bridge area causing considerable damage. As the Warbird flies over the SSD it fires a turbo laser striking the Warbird in the wing and causing it to veer off course into a White Star.
Burgyone: eeewwww...not good, the White Star was destroyed and the Warbird is in bad, bad shape. HEY! THERE'S A DISRUPTER THAT'S NOT FIRING? WHY IS THAT?
Voyager flies through the Warbird wreckage and fires that super-cannon it recently bought. The Cannon causes massive damage to the SSD, sending it crashing into 2 nearby SDs destroying all three ships.
Burgyone: A SD just rammed through 2 Narn cruisers! The Narn cruisers are dead, but the SDs shields protected it! WAAAHHHH!!! NO FAIR!!!
Burgyone: The Imperials have all but caged us in....it looks like we either abandon the Narns or go down with them........I DON'T WANNA DIE!!!! I WANNA MAKE UP SOME HOAKY WAY SO THAT I CAN ESCAPE AND KILL THE IMPERIALS WITHOUT A SWEAT.......WAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!! wait, some kind of vortex is opening, there's a small ship coming out....it looks Federation-ish in design....
Z: Hi everbody! I want to introduce you to my personalized fighter! This baby is larger than any other 1 man fighter in existance, and it packs 5 phaser banks, 3 Quantum torpedo launchers, a disrupter cannon, warp capability and, *pulls some switches to reveal 2 large red buttons* TWO NUCLEAR WARHEADS!!!
Z's fighter shakes backwards as it releases two 3 megaton bombs into the heart of the Imperial fleet. A few damaged capital ships are destroyed, and most are tossed about off their current orientation.
Burgyone: Awwww, why's he get his own fighter????
Z: Because, I've been here longer than you, nah-nah-nah.....bbblllttt!!! Anyway, I'm pushing fire buttons just as fast as I can, woe be to whoever gets in the way!
Burgyone: Well, Z seems to have caused enough confusion, Voyager has managed to escape and the Narns are blasting their way through the Imperial fleet.
Z: HEY!! Why you all running? We can win! Honest!
Another Narn cruiser goes down and Z's fighter is hit causing the shields to fall to 55%
Burgyone: We're heading out too, the Romulans are fighting through the thinnest part of the Imperial fleet...and ooh, there goes another Warbird....
Z: Not to worry, I've got dozens of fighters like this and a large Federation fleet on its way, let's kick some butt! Yeah! The Narns and Romulans are forming up! Let's take 'em down!
Burgyone:......Z is having hallucinations....
Author: You might be confused at this point, so I'll clarify. Z is prone to fits of hallucinations, so Burgyone is correct and Z is in a dangerously incorrect daydream.
Z: My reinforcements are here and we're sending the Empire running! They've lost over 99.5% of their fleet and my shields are back to full strength!
Burgyone: The Romulan and Narn fleets are about out of the danger zone, and Z's out there by himself with his shields nearly gone....
Z: BLAM!!! Ha! Puny turbolazers! They can't even dent my shields!
A Star Destroyer fires another shot and Z's fighter dissapears in a bright fireball.
Burgyone: Z? Z's gone.......and I never got my chance to make fun of him.......
In just the nick of time the Romulans and Narns escape. The Narns limp off to a Narn base and the Romulans head for Romulus but are intercepted.
Admiral Hauge: So, Burgyone. You're the one that could have thrown the Federation into another war? Well, we have a surprise for you.
Burgyone: Hey, I'm a commentator, and I'm not part of Starfleet, how can you blame me? It was the Romulans I was risking anyway.
A fleet of Klingon Warships warp in.
Kahless: Cut it out Burgyone. Not that, I Kahless, the greatest Klingon Warrior ever object to a little bloodshed, Starfleet does.....and they basically run the Alpha quadrant as much as we hate to admit it.....
Admiral Hauge: Thanks for the compliment Kahless.......
Kahless: By the way, what happened to Z? I noticed he was gone, it was quiet.
Burgyone: Well......it's like this.......
A mean looking black Starfury with exra guns flies by. On top is the letter 'Z' which is in blood red and looks like it was written in blood.
Z: I was having hallucinations....
Kahless: Still? oi, I swear the writer should just kill this schitzophrenic off....
Z: And my primary fighter got blown up, and I managed to escape in my spare.
Kahless: Fine, fine. Now, dock and let's get Burgyone court martialed.
Burgyone:......Life is not fair....
Z: Kahless, I am so glad at your relief that I lived.
Kahless: Yeah...yeah, fine...nice to see you.....still breathing Z.
The Federation and Klingon ships head back for the Star Trek Universe with the Romulans in tow. A disgruntled Burgyone mumbles the whole way there.